Hetalia: Ask a Nation!
by Lady-ID
Summary: Here is gathered every country in the world, and you, a group of hapless humans, get to exclusively interview them. How can you pass up such a grand chance like that? See inside for rules. Thank you.
1. The Rules

**Disclaimer:** The Axis Powers Hetalia franchise belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. I obviously don't own it.

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><p><em>Introduction<em>

Greetings. Though I'm certainly no stranger to the Hetalia series, I'm new here on . This will be used as an exercise to help me get character personalities right, as well as to hopefully provide others with some form of entertainment?

I don't know myself. I have a BioShock story in the works along with a few other things. Escapism when I'm frustrated with the other pieces... Yes, I suppose you could call this as such.

Anyway, onto the rules. Please read them carefully.

_RULES:_ Just send me a note with questions. The maximum number of questions you can ask is three per session (chapter). The "countries" will answer you back to their furthest knowledgeable extent. The following countries (living or otherwise) are present at this panel. **(highlighted in bold are OC's. Yes, I know Romania is now an official character, but the information given thus far is a little too sketchy to work with and unfamiliar with my knowledge of the country I know).**

_Male:_ North Italy/Veneziano  
>Germany<br>Japan  
>America<br>England  
>France<br>Russia  
>China<br>Canada  
>Austria<br>Switzerland  
>Spain<br>South Italy/Romano  
>Prussia<br>Greece  
>Turkey<br>Netherlands  
>Poland<br>Estonia  
>Lithuania<br>Latvia  
>Cuba<br>Australia  
>Denmark<br>Iceland  
>Norway<br>Sweden  
>Finland<br>Hong Kong  
><strong>Scotland<strong>  
>Roma Antiqua<br>Germania  
>Holy Roman Empire<br>Sealand [yes, he is not a country, but I've allowed him to at least be interviewed so he would stop fussing]

_Females:_ Hungary  
>Liechtenstein<br>Monaco  
>Wy<br>Belgium  
>Ukraine<br>Belarus  
>Vietnam<br>Taiwan  
>Seychelles<br>**Romania  
>Ireland<strong>  
>Ancient Greece<br>Ancient Egypt  
><strong>India<strong>

Keep questions civil and at least PG-13 (though, some of the responses… may be a little explicit, depending on the character). No bashing characters. Period.

Either than that, have fun and ask away.


	2. Of Ransacking Suggestions

**A/N:** To clarify some confusion on the rules… I'm terribly sorry that I didn't specify that questions are to be asked from a human perspective. For example, no asking questions as if you were a country/state/province/city etc.. Other than that, I saw no other violations.

Also, **South Korea** will be joining the panel as of now.

**Thank you** to all those who submitted questions. It really means a lot, truly. Please enjoy this first bit and review/ask more questions.

**Disclaimer:** _Axis Powers Hetalia_ belongs to author Hidekaz Himaruya. I obviously don't own it.

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><p>Session I: Of Ransacking Suggestions<p>

**Q: Prussia, if you got your country back who would you invade first and why?**

_Prussia:_ "Psh, zhat's easy!" *eyes Hungary and grins* "Vhy you ask? Revenge for calling me a 'lazy bastard who sits on his ass in his little Bruder's basement all day long on his computer'… und all those years of smacking me vith zhat frying pan."  
><em>Hungary:<em> "That _is_ what you do all day; blog. And get those thoughts of invasion out of your head this instant before I do it myself! You deserved those smacks and you know it!"

**Q: Russia, where did you get your coat? It's really awesome and I'd like one just like it.**

_Russia:_ "My Red Army coat? Ah, спасибо." *smiles* "I actually don't know where you could get one these days… maybe try looking on internet shopping site?"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Or just go to his place and nick one from a museum. My teacher went to Saint Petersburg this past summer and saw her high school uniform on display at a museum there… and she's not past 40. She must have had a fun time explaining that to her small children."

**Q: Spain, what does Romano's curl do? **

_Spain:_ "Mi poco de tomate?" *grins* "Why, it's like his brother's! One touch, and he turns red and starts whimpering for a pretty niña to-"  
><em>Romano:<em> "That's enough, you fucking bastard!" *turns bright red and turns away*  
><em>Belgium:<em> "Oh, Romano, he doesn't mean it like that! …Honestly!"

**Q: Ireland, do you hate England? **

_Ireland:_ "Aye, that Ah do! Why would ye think otherwise? Though, he used tah be a good child, but that was nigh before he became a bloody pirate and his bosses began treatin' me and meh people like scum of the earth."  
><em>Lady-ID:<em>"Miss Ireland, please stop gripping the table so hard; you're splintering the wood."

**Q: Prussia, how can anyone be that awesome?**

_Prussia:_ "If zhey are Gilbert Beilschmidt, zhat's how!"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "…Plausible…"  
><em>Hungary:<em> "Another requirement to be 'Prussia-Awesome' is to have an ego big enough to choke one of my horses."

**Q: England, does your magic have a connection to Harry Potter? I just wondered because Harry Potter's British and you're technically Britain.**

_England:_ "Well, not exactly. The magic in _Harry Potter_ for the most part is the fictional work of Ms. Rowling, and though the principle of potion making is the same, I have no use for a wand. All you truly need is chalk and the right incantations."  
><em>America:<em> "Not even a special wand?" *grins*  
><em>England:<em> "Of course not, you blithering idiot! I'm not that perversion of nature, France!"  
><em>France:<em> "Ah, mon ami; tickle wands are splendid! You don't know what you're missing!"  
><em>England:<em>"Stay away from me or else!"

**Q: Austria, what do you think of Prussia? You like him? **

_Austria:_"Vell… for one, Herr Prussia is somezing of an idiot, and he enjoys bothering me for no other reason than for the sake of bothering. Have you ever tried relaxing when someone breaks into your home? It isn't very pleasant."

**Q: Canada, WHY ARE YOU NOT APPRECIATED! CANADA HAS THE BEST MAPLE SYRUP!**

_Canada:_ "I… I don't know… maybe it's because I'm not as loud as everyone else… I'm just lost in the crowd, I guess." *shrugs* "America even forgets I exist sometimes, and he's my brother. I'm glad that you like my syrup. Thank you." *smiles*  
><em>Lady-ID:<em>"I believe you just made Canada's day. Alright, break time. Come back in thirty minutes for the next session!"


	3. Cover Your Vitals, Ladies

Thank you to all of the reviewers. It means heaps, truly. Feel free to keep reviewing/questioning.

**Disclaimer:** _Axis Powers Hetalia_ belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. I obviously don't own it.

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><p>Session II: Cover Your Vitals, Ladies<p>

**Q: America! Georgia and Florida are fighting over whether peaches or oranges are better again!**

_America:_ "What? I told them to stop before I left the hou- wait…" *thinks for a second* "Hey! This isn't a question!"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "They got you there… but maybe you should check in on Florida and Georgia to be safe."  
><em>America:<em> "Good idea. They tore up the backyard last time I left them alone together in bad moods…" *walks off to make a phone call quick*

**Q: Deutschland! Three Words: GERMAN. SPARKLE. PARTAY.**

_Germany:_ "… … …I don't know how to respond to zhis."  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "I'm translating this as a subliminal message to take off your shirt, put on some glitter, and start dancing to dubstep. Tsk, tsk, people. Trying to turn this interview into a beefcake dance fest now?"  
><em>France:<em> "Bonne idée ! In fact, we should all have one of Mr. Germany's sparkle parties on ze break!"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Or you could all keep your clothes on as to not poke anyone's eye out?"  
><em>France:<em> "Onhonhonhonhon~"

**Q: Prußen and Canada, there's a place in Canada called "New Prussia." So... does this mean Prußen finally caved and became one with his "Birdie"?**

_Canada:_ "We promised we wouldn't ever speak of that in public! I'm sorry…"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "…Something tells me that there may be a juicy story under this…"

**Q: Prussia, besides being awesome, what's your other super power?**

_Prussia:_ *smirks evilly* "Zhe ability to see straight through all zhe vomen's clothes~ Und I am liking vhat I'm seeing so far."  
><em>Hungary:<em> *frowns* "And the uncanny ability to somehow not die from getting hit in the head with cast iron."  
><em>Prussia:<em> "Zhat's a resistance zhat's been built up over zhe years, Frau."

**Q: America, what are your opinions on English cuisine?**

_America:_ "You know I haven't really had any of England's food for a while, so I can't remember how it tastes. But then again, I do remember those stupid scones… they had the consistency of dried cow shit."  
><em>England:<em>"I have not the faintest idea why you and everyone else hate scones so much; they're delicious!"  
><em>America:<em> "Yeah, sure dude; if you like the taste of couch stuffing. Whatever floats your boat."  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "…I'm kind of interested to know how you know what couch stuffing tastes like, Mr. America."  
><em>America:<em> "1930's, Stock Market Crash, Great Depression; it wasn't pretty, man."

**Q: America, isn't the King of Prussia mall awesome? (Like Prussia?)**

_America:_ "It's awesome alright, but the awesome is equal to how he _was_… back in his heyday!"  
><em>Prussia:<em> *glares and grumbles*  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Ouch, you pretty much just called him an old man."

**Q: Prussia, THERES A CITY IN AMERICA NAMED AFTER YOU!**

_Prussia:_ *smirks* "It's because Herr fünf Meter is like a virus. Meine awesome spreads und gets under your skin~"

**Q: America and England, which of you has the best music and why?**

_America:_ "Dude, you know it's me!"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Why do you think that?"  
><em>America:<em> "I've got all the good bands, that's why! Who's he got? A bunch of insects with guitars and funny haircuts?" *smirks*  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "…Right… two words, Mr. America: DAVID BOWIE."  
><em>England:<em> *smirks at America's defeated face*

**Q: Norway, what do you think of Norwegian black metal?**

_Norway:_ "I like it. Even listen to it from time to time…" *goes back to talking to the air*

**Q: Germany, who irritates you more North Italy or Prussia?**

_Germany:_ "Vell… Italy, he is too irrational und blubbers a lot, und Bruder doesn't know vhen to shut up. He also doesn't know vhat is appropriate at zhe right time and vhat isn't-"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Say, didn't you chase Mr. Prussia up a flagpole last week for dropping your pants in front of some ladies because he wanted to show them that 'five meters does run in the family'?"  
><em>Germany:<em> *Closes eyes and rubs temples* "…Ja…"

**Q: To all the nations, if you could choose between going to a **_**Twilight**_** or **_**Harry Potter**_** midnight premier which would you choose?**

_Lady-ID:_ "They all just gave me disgusted looks, so I'm guessing that though some might not care for _Harry Potter_, it's preferred over _Twilight_."  
><em>Poland:<em>"Like, totes, babe… totes."

**Q: Prussia, I read on the internet that you are coming back as a micro nation... How do you feel about that?**

_Prussia:_ "Fucking awesome!" *nods proudly* "Just you vait, I'll be back in zhe game once again! I'll be an even bigger und cooler Prussia zhan ever before! Everyone vill bow down to me!"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "And hopefully it'll get you out of your brother's basement?"  
><em>Prussia:<em>*makes a face*

**Q: America, what made you think **_**Twilight**_** was a good idea? I mean it sucks! By the way, my friends tell me I act just like you!**

_America:_ "Okay, let's get this straight, dudes and dudettes. I can't control the wet dreams middle-aged moms have, or stop them from publishing them in the form of a book. I know it sucks majorly… but that's probably because it's kind of a chick book, and I'm kind of a guy. Also… FREAKING AWESOME! HIGH FIVE!"  
><em>England:<em> "Bloody hell, we don't need another one of him…"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Mr. America, are you sure that you didn't agree to the publication of _Twilight _because you knew full well that it would be a gigantic cash cow?"  
><em>America:<em>"…Positive."

**Q: England, if America asked would you take him back?**

_England:_ "Not even if he got on his knees and begged. Aside from my own current financial problems, he is steeped in national debt. Who in their sane mind would want to carry all that baggage? It's completely out of the question. Also… he's an uncultured nitwit with no taste and-"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em>"Thank you, Mr. England, but this isn't going to become a 'let's all rag on America' interview… yet. Next question, please."

**Q: Spain, how are the tomato plants coming along? And why don't you visit your former colonies like Florida or Mexico?**

_Spain:_ "They're growing nice and red, like Romano's cheeks when he gets embarrass-"  
><em>Romano:<em> "Stai zitto!" *frowns*  
><em>Spain: <em>*Grins* "As for my former colonies… I've seen Florida a few times when America hosts world meetings, but México shuts their door in my face. Something tells me that they don't want to see me…"

**Q: Italy, what's your feelings for Germany? And on a scale of one to ten how much do you like Pasta?**

_Italy:_ "Oh, I like Germany very much! He's one of my best friends, and he lets me cook for him sometimes when I come to visit! Only, I have to bring the food over because all he has is German food." *nods and grins* "E io amo la pasta! I love it too much to put it on a scale! A nice big plate of fettuccini would be great; I think I'll go make some right now!"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Lunch is after the next session."  
><em>Italy:<em>*makes a sad face*

**Q: Canada, I recognize you anywhere! You are so cool!**

_Canada:_"Oh, why… thank you… that's very kind of you… *blushes and cracks a tiny smile*

**Q: Romania, how does it feel to finally be an actual character in the anime?**

_Romania:_ "Hm… I'm not too sure. How you say… 'elated'? Yes, that seems about right."  
><em>Hungary:<em> "What the hell are you doing here?"  
><em>Romania:<em> "…Interviewer, you never told me that there would be children here."  
><em>Lady-ID: <em>"Must have been a slip of the mind, Miss Romania. Sorry."

**Q: Korea, why do you always try to grope everyone, especially China and Japan?**

_South Korea:_ "I like the reactions I get, da ze~ Also, China and Japan are the ones who never hear me sneak up on them, so it makes them easy targets!" *edges closer to Japan with a smile*  
><em>Japan: <em>*scoots away*

**Q: Greece, can I pet one of your kitties! They are so cool!**

_Greece:_ "… … …" *snores on*  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Mr. Greece? You were just asked a question."  
><em>Greece:<em> "…Hm?" *wakes up*  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "I quote, 'Greece, can I pet one of your kitties! They are so cool!'"  
><em>Greece: <em>"Oh… yes… I guess that's alright…"

**Q: Hungary, what is your favorite yaoi pairing?**

_Hungary:_ "Oh, I hate it when I'm asked that question. I can never choose just one!"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Okay… well, did you like that movie you saw at America's place?"  
><em>Hungary: <em>"Brokeback Mountain? Oh… yes… very much so..." *blushes guiltily*  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "And I seem to recall a pleased smile when you watched X-Men: First Class."

**Q: Canada, I notice you! I swear! Is there any country that notices you? **

_Canada:_"Well… consistently? Mr. Prussia and Miss Ukraine always know who I am and speak to me. I'm thankful for that at least."

**Q: For anyone (except France, Spain, and Prussia), would you dare stay in a room alone with those three? *points to France, Spain, and Prussia***

_Romano:_ *eye twitches* "Unless you plan on getting raped, then hell no!"  
><em>Belgium:<em> "They are called the 'Bad Touch Trio' for a reason." *smiles nervously*

**Q: Romano, choose. Spain or your fratello, North Italy?**

_Romano:_ "Why are you making me choose between that clingy bastard and my idiot little brother?"  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "I can practically see the steam coming out of your ears."

**Q: America, you, sir, are the hero.**

_America:_ *salutes* "Why, yes I am."  
><em>Lady-ID:<em> "Okay, that wraps up our second session. Come back in a bit for the next!"


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